April GC - Elder Oaks

As Elder Oaks spoke on divorce and the "weakening concept of marraige" in the world today, I seLatter-day Saint spouses should do all within their power to preserve their marriages -

"...They should follow the marriage enrichment counsel in the First Presidency's message in the April 2007 Ensign and Liahona.5 To avoid so-called "incompatibility," they should be best friends, kind and considerate, sensitive to each other's needs, always seeking to make each other happy. They should be partners in family finances, working together to regulate their desires for temporal things.emed to focus on his instruction to those that are married."

Realizing that marraige isn't necessarily living "happy ever after", Elder Oaks said -

"...Of course, there can be times when one spouse falls short and the other is wounded and feels pain. When that happens, the one who is wronged should balance current disappointments against the good of the past and the brighter prospects of the future.

Don't treasure up past wrongs, reprocessing them again and again. In a marriage relationship, festering is destructive; forgiving is divine (see D&C 64:9–10). Plead for the guidance of the Spirit of the Lord to forgive wrongs (as President Faust has just taught us so beautifully), to overcome faults, and to strengthen relationships.

If you are already descending into the low state of marriage-in-name-only, please join hands, kneel together, and prayerfully plead for help and the healing power of the Atonement. Your humble and united pleadings will bring you closer to the Lord and to each other and will help you in the hard climb back to marital harmony."

I feel strongly again with the quote -

"...Don't treasure up past wrongs, reprocessing them again and again. In a marriage relationship, festering is destructive; forgiving is divine..."

A quote from a wise bishop was -

"...Even those who think their spouse is entirely to blame should not act hastily. One study found "no evidence that divorce or separation typically made adults happier than staying in an unhappy marriage. Two out of three unhappily married adults who avoided divorce reported being happily married five years later." A woman who persisted in an intolerable marriage for many years until the children were raised explained: "There were three parties to our marriage—my husband and I and the Lord. I told myself that if two of us could hang in there, we could hold it together."

Elder Oaks testified -

"Whatever the outcome and no matter how difficult your experiences, you have the promise that you will not be denied the blessings of eternal family relationships if you love the Lord, keep His commandments, and just do the best you can."